Ready Or Not...

There is a saying "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans."  These words must have run through my head hundreds, if not thousands of times throughout my pregnancy.  Every time I proudly told someone "I'm having a scheduled c-section on October 23!" in the back of my mind I'd have a flash of doubt.  It was not up to me to schedule someone's birthday.  I loved the idea of having a timeline and a plan, and since everything else about the pregnancy went smoothly, I didn't let myself worry about things not going my way.  I must have been making God laugh pretty hard...

Sunday, October 17 at 8pm: 
Ben, my mom (THANKFULLY she moved her flight up 4 days and was already in Cali), and I had just finished dinner and were lounging around on the couch watching TV.  I was mentally counting down the days and hours until my c-section, when I felt and heard a "POP!" and shuffled off to the bathroom.  My head was spinning.  I ignored all the labor sections of the 10 pregnancy books I read because I planned to skip that part.  We still had 5 days and 14 hours until the boys were going to arrive!!  All I knew was the majority of women are already far into labor before their water breaks.  I had ZERO contractions, no pain, nothing...  and my water certainly had broken.  My doctor wasn't even in town!  It was all very overwhelming but we managed to collect our things and rush off to the hospital.  (Here's an embarrassing tid-bit: I wore a newborn diaper on the car ride there to absorb the "water".  Let's just say that's not what they were made for.)

9:00 PM

Everything moved really quickly once we arrived at the hospital.  I barely remember being wheeled up to Labor & Delivery and before I knew it I was wearing a gown, hooked up to a bunch of monitors, had an IV in my arm, and the worst pain I've ever felt ripped through my body every minute.  I was screaming for pain medicine almost immediately.  By the time the anesthesiologist arrived he could have told me that his method for managing pain was removing my head, keeping it on ice, and reattaching it to my body after the boys were born and I would have jumped at the opportunity.  The nurse informed me I was only 2-3 centimeters dialated.  I thought "Who cares?  I'm having a c-section, lady.  Please stop touching me unless you have pain killers."  Then my doctor arrived - it was a miracle!  I thought she was out of town but she had just stepped off a plane from Chicago, turned on her phone, and received the call that I was in labor so she rushed over to deliver our babies.  Then she checked me not 5 minutes later and I was progressing very quickly - 5-6 centimeters - so I was rushed off to get things started before I delivered the boys on my own.

10:00 PM

After being rolled into the operating room and given a spinal (ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh relief!) things really started to get dramatic.  I was pretty out of it because they let me suck on the nitrus gas while they gave me the shot but I knew something was wrong.  I heard my doctor say "baby's heart rate is dropping, we have to get him out now."  I looked over at Ben who was bent over praying.  Before I could muster the courage to ask "What's wrong?" at 10:20pm I heard it:  "WAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"  Our son was announcing his arrival into the world.  It was the best noise ever.  Ben ran over to meet him and a minute later I heard the next "WAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"  2 babies.  2 cries.  2 miracles.  I laughed and cried and begged that someone bring them over so I could see them.  Ben proudly appeared from behind the curtain with a tiny 5 pound 7 ounce bundle.  "This is Michael John."  I couldn't believe how little he was.  And how full of life he was.  And how perfect he was.  AND HE WAS OURS.  Then Ben disappeared and came back with a slightly larger 5 pound 10 ounce bundle "This is Andrew Douglas."  Another perfect little boy.  Michael and Andrew.  I loved the names Ben picked.  I loved Ben.  I loved our sons.  We were a family.

I'll spare you the details of my drama of being put back together again and share some picks of Ben and the babies during their first hour of life.


Ben bringing Michael and Andrew to meet Grandma



Michael holding his Daddy's hand



Andrew trying to smile at his Daddy

After what seemed like an eternity I was finally taken to recovery where I got to hold my boys for the first time.  Andrew came out first and when Ben put him in my arms it was truly amazing.  It is hard to put into words but it was like every birthday and Christmas and any other great day of my life rolled up into the happiest moment possible.  I couldn't stop staring at him until Michael came out to join us.  They were the sweetest little boys I've ever seen.  And I was their Mommy!!